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Shame Is A Wasted Emotion

Here’s a little chat on the topic of shame. If you swipe, you’ll see a random lady messaged and said “the shame that rests on your words who are affected by incurable STI’s hurts my heart”. Initially I interpreted her DM that I should be ashamed of myself for posting that. Then it dawned on me that she feels bad for people living with shame due to STI’s. (This was in response to me replying to some strange soliciting me for sex in my DMs when I said “I have herpes”.) Here’s the thing; Shame is a wasted emotion. Now- if you took two 🐱s and drowned them in a video, that’s pretty goddamn shameful. If you’re an alcoholic like me, who when untreated had more unprotected sex post assault than I care to think about (and it’s miraculous my vagina hasn’t fallen off prior to me getting sober over a decade ago), that could be considered shameful. Or the number of times I drove in a blackout on a daily basis and easily could have killed someone, further risking cop’s lives, that could be considered shameful. However- there’s an easier way to adulting and it goes a lil sumthin like this:

1. Admit you screwed up

2. Apologize

3. Do your best to not repeat and fix damage. 4. Forgive yourself FFS.

5. Grow and become a better person.

When it comes to “shame” and “heart hurting”, ask yourself if you’re perpetuating the stigma? Also, what assumptions are you making? If we all own our shit- there’s no need to be ashamed. I’m an addict, alcoholic, have herpes on my face as we speak, have slept with more people than I can count, and have done some HORRIFIC damage to others in my using days, but I’ve taken ownership and cleaned house.

By you feeling offended or casting shame upon others, what are you accomplishing when it comes to stigmas?

Also mad respect for the people in blue. Yes, a handful of you suck. But most of you fkn rock and risk your life daily keeping drunks and drug addicts off the road like myself. So if you’re feeling ashamed because you have herpes, HIV, or whatever other STI you can think of, step into your power and don’t be a victim. Even for those who had it forced upon you- the health conditions of your body and mind, do not define you.

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Kortney

Kortney Olson is a visionary powerhouse who is making her mark to create a world where women are free from all forms of self-harm. Kortney is the Originator of the not-for-profit organisation, Kamp Konfidence, which is a prevention-based wellness experience for teenage girls aged 14-17 that has taken the country of Australia by storm. The Kamp Konfidence team are on a mission to teach the habits, principles and lessons that aid the development of self love, all in a non-judgemental, fun and friendly environment.

Kortney is the first and reigning Australian Women’s arm wrestling champion, Queensland state Brazilian jiu jitsu champion, 4 time international bodybuilding competitor, author, TV personality, certified personal trainer, and Olympic lifting and cross fit coach. Kortney is here to raise the bar-bell in gender equality.

Kortney’s proudest accomplishment is being crowned as “The woman with the world’s deadliest thighs” by Stan Lee, creator of Marvel Comics, after she appeared on an episode of Superhumans where she demonstrated her leg strength by smashing watermelons between her thighs, exerting 3 times the crush force of a reticulated python, and knocking out a professional MMA fighter.

“I have this unshakeable belief that if the female energy isn’t united, lifted up and emancipated globally, our chances of survival as a human race are slim to none. How can we focus on be our best when we’re busy fearing we look our worst?”

Kortney loves dogs, plays golf, and likes to leave the toilet seat up after using the men’s restroom. She’s also certified as a Laughter Yoga instructor and a Psych-K Facilitator, with the aim to empower and inspire people to seek natural wellness.